Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Blotchy the Skanky Turtle

Blotchy the Skanky Turtle sat immobile in her lavender bed pan, screaming "I'm a goddamn turtle in an aquarium in someone's living room! Oh my God! Kill me!"

Nobody moved. Sqwawky the porcupine, Sloo the miniature giraffe and Bubbles the talking tangerine all stared at her, not daring interrupt her inner terror.

"Don't you shits look at me like I'm crazy. I'm a goddmn turtle! We're all... insignificant and we're going to die this way! Lord God Christ kill me now!"

"Butternut squash, Sloo?" asked Sqwawky.

"Oh why yes, thank you, dear. I'm so hungry and I forgot to eat after I woke up from my nap that was... interrupted..." said Sloo. "I often wonder how much silence is killed by that turtle. Poor little sound particles of non-sound bee bee gunned into oblivion by that turtle. If only they knew how lovely life were. Ah, such is life." Sqwawky hands her the two pieces of butternut squash. "Thank you, dear."

Blotchy sat on her stomach and spoke. "Dear friends of the living room. I am sorry for my outburst. I had a dream and it bothered me. I saw myself being thrown across the living room at great speed, and hitting a box of Froot Loops and then landing in a pile of dust. When I came to, I was visited by three spirits. LIsa, Marie and Presley."

To be continued...

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